Shine bright, like a diamond.

I've been given a bit of guff from members of the Pagan community because of my blending of Jewish traditions into my personal path/religious practice.

I've never really understood why people take issue with it, but like many things that go unanswered, I'm not overly concerned with the whys. I am happy with my path and the steps I am  taking along it. I don't give a flying frog fart about what other people think about it. It is MY journey after all. Not theirs.

I am saying this because tonight I will be lighting the two menorahs we own and sitting in the glow of the candle light and reflecting on how I can be like those candles.

You see, when I light the candles I make sure all of the lights in my apartment are off. I then light the shamash (shamash means servant and is the candle that sits slightly higher than the rest. It is used to light the candles with. Basically, a "need fire" candle) and reflect on how I am like the little candle. On it's own the shamash gives off a bit of light but not all that much. It is bright in the darkness but it is alone.

As I say the prayers and light the other candles I reflect on how those candles are like the people around me. The men and women I deal with on a daily basis. The shamash shares it's flame with the other candles and takes them from from thin bits of wax and turns them into shining beacons. Warm and bright in the darkness.

When all of the candles are lit my apartment has a bit of a glow to it. Warmth radiates from my altar (where I keep the menorahs) and the living room is bright enough that I can see in the darkness. Sure, the candles don't light all of the rooms in my apartment but the room I am in is warm and filled with cheer because of those tiny lights, all in a row, working together to push aside the darkness.

That is really what the winter holidays are all about in my opinion. They aren't about the Christ child, or the newly born Sun god. They aren't about a battle fought by a rag-tag army generations upon generations ago. They aren't about heritage or culture. The winter holidays are about light in the darkness. They are about hope for a new beginning. The sweet promise of a new and better time to come.

We celebrate in the darkness with our lights because we are celebrating, just as our ancestors did, a time when the dark was more than winter gloom. We are celebrating a promise. The promise of a spring to come. We are celebrating the hope that we will live through the dark and cold. Through the snow and ice that is surely to come. We are celebrating the idea that we will be here to see the spring again and know the warmth of the sun on our faces.

We are all lighting candles, or tree lights, and sending unspoken wishes of survival out into the dark. Each candle and light is a tiny statement of bravery. Each pinprick of light is shinning in the darkness and proclaiming that it knows that the darkness and cold of winter are coming but that it is not afraid because it is not alone.

It is my prayer for you, as I light my Chanukah candles and then again for Saint Lucia day, then the 12 days of Yule, that you will be a light in the darkness.

May your inner light of strength and compassion shine brightly in the darkness.
May you find peace and happiness in the years to come.
May you be a beacon unto those who need a helping hand.

Happy Holidays and to tweak a quote from Tiny Tim...

May the Gods bless us, every one!

Can I use a birthday candle in a pinch?

Today is my 30th birthday. When I think about the implications of that I smile. 

I have taken 30 trips around the sun. I have lived, laughed, loved, cried, fought, and fallen in love for 30 years. While that number isn't as "great" as the numbers my friends and family can claim, I am happy with it. 

As I have mentioned in past posts, I love Loki but my heart belongs to Brigid. Not only is it my birthday, but I also have a flame tending shift for Her today. I am having a hard time not seeing that as a sign. 

I have been struggling with the idea of who I am in regards Her and the faces of the Goddess for a few months. 

I am not a maiden by any stretch of the imagination, but I am also not the traditional idea of a mother. 

It is my hope, and if I am honest with myself my birthday wish, that I will be able to call myself a Priestess of Brigid by the time I have completed my 40th trip around the sun. 

And on that note... I have nothing else to say besides:

Hail Brigid, 

Breo-saighead - Flaming Arrow.

Fire of Inspiration.

Smith of so much more than metal. 

Lady of Fire and Water.

You are my heart. 

You are my passion.

You are my Goddess.

I honor you today. 

Hail Brigid.

Pagans who cover... Yes, this again.

Last year there was a bit of a kerfuffle about Pagans who have chosen to take up wearing the veil, aka cover their hair and/or body. As a Pagan who covers I felt a mild amount of interest in the issue but decided to ignore it because frankly, I didn't really care. There was a big enough issue though that Covered In Light asked that people from all religions cover their hair on Friday September 21st (2012) in a show of support and to raise awareness. My coven and a few of our close friends all covered as did a knitting group I am a part of. It was a fun experience and I ended up covering the entire day in a hijab style, which is a great deal more than I usually do. Here is a picture...I looked super cute, if I do say so myself.

We are about a month out from September 21st again and I am hoping that Covered In Light Day will happen this year as well. Which is why, a year after all the covering butt hurt, I am addressing this subject. Below are a series of questions I have been asked by people in the past few years. If you cover and you want to answer these questions on your blog, please do.

How long have you been covering and why do you do it?

I have been covering my hair for about three years. It all started when I took up the mantle of tending Brigid's flame. I had my first cill for Her on July 4th 2010. About mid September 2010 I started feeling a push to cover my hair when I was tending Her flame or when I was doing anything at my altar. I talked it over with my husband to explain what I was doing and started covering every once in a while, usually with a pashmina scarf draped around my head. At the beginning of December 2010 I decided to cover full time starting January 1st, 2011. My mother, who is amazingly supportive, got me a few pashmina scarves for Yule and I bought a few tichels online.
I don't only cover because of Brigid, though tending her flame was what kick started it, I had been debating covering my hair for a while before that. I am married and while my husband didn't ask me to cover (and REALLY didn't want me to cover when I first started) I felt it was appropriate given the fact that my spiritual path has a lot of Jewish influence. There is a long history of religious people, not to mention married women, covering their hair for one reason or another.

How does it affect your life/how people interact with you?

I don't think it has really changed much. My husband says that people look at me differently but I have never noticed. My relationship with my father was affected by my hair covering, but that is because I have more than a passing interest in Judaism and he saw my head covering as a rejection of my Heathen roots (I am ancestrally Norwegian on his side) for the traditions of a  "genetically inferior" race of people(his words, not mine). His comments caused a rift in my family and my sisters all refuse to deal with him, as do a few of my cousins, based on his comments and behavior in regards to my head scarves. Granted, the head covering was not the only issue between my father and me but it was the beginning of the end. Literally everyone else in my life has been incredibly supportive and amazing, even going so far as to defend me to people who ask why I do it.

Are you always covered? If not, when/where do you cover and why?

I tend to only cover if I am outside my house or the house of one of my coven mates. If I am home but have non-coven guests, or if someone is at my door, I cover my hair as well. I don't usually cover at home because it is my private area where I can be relaxed and comfortable. The same goes for the houses of my coven mates.

As a Pagan, how do you feel your covering reflects on the community at large?

I don't know that it really reflects on the Pagan community at all. If it does, feel free to let me know because I am not aware of it.

What is your take on the view that covering is anti-feminist?

My take on it is that, first and foremost, it isn't anti-feminist because it is my choice. No one is forcing me to cover my hair. Secondly, my body belongs to me. I own my body. My body doesn't belong to anyone else and I don't owe the viewing of my body to a single person. Not even my husband. The sight of my naked skin or hair doesn't belong to anyone but me, and if I chose to hide it and keep it out of view of the world, that is my right. My covering is actually me taking a stand against the bull shit way our society treats women. It is my way of saying that my body belongs to me and that I decide who is worthy of seeing it. My body isn't for the world at large. It is private.

People like to say that covering is a sign of oppression as well. Yes, in parts of the world, it is. However, I live in Brooklyn, New York in the United States of America. In New York City it is legal for a woman to walk around in just a pair of underwear on as long as she isn't making money off of it. That means I can legally walk down the street with my tits hanging out for everyone to see and there is nothing that the government can do about it. It's one of the things I love about my city. I can walk around topless if I want, just like I can walk around fully covered with a veil over my face if I want to. I get to choose what I wear. I get to be who I am. No one is telling me what I have to do. Also, as I mentioned before, there is a long history of people covering their hair for religious reasons and no I am not just talking about women. Men cover their hair as well depending on their faith. Male Sikhs are religiously obligated to keep their hair long and keep a golden comb in their hair. In order to protect the comb (which they are also obligated to do) they  tend to cover their hair in a turban style. Abrahamic faiths (Judaism and Islam) also have head covering traditions for men. This is usually seen in the form of a yarmulke or kufi. We all know that Catholic Nuns cover their hair but bishops, cardinals and The Pope are occasionally required to cover during service as well.

Covering is not anti-feminist, however, telling a woman how she can dress is. Take note y'all because I have no problem telling someone off for giving me shit over my head scarf.

Do you ever get grief from cops or airport security because of your covering?

Nope. For the most part people leave me alone. The only thing that is different now is the fact that airport security asks to pat my head to make sure I am not carrying bombs in my tichel.

What is your favorite covering style?

I prefer a tichel style but if I am pressed for time (or being lazy) I wear my manky green army cap. Here are a few videos that show how to tie a tichel.

Both videos are great, but there are a ton of videos out there so go to Youtube and search for "how to tie a tichel", "how to tie a headscarf", and/or "hijab tutorial".
Personally, I tend to do a layered crown style of tying. Here are two pictures of what I mean:

Where do you buy your scarves?

Kmart, Target and Old Navy have great rectangular scarves that are made of light/thin materials in the spring and summer. If you want to go online take a look at Cover Your Hair and Covered With Style. They are great for square scarves (tichels). If you want more of a hijab style I can recommend Hijab Girl. I haven't looked anywhere else for hijabs but I know that you can find pashmina scarves all over the place and they are a typical scarf used for hijabs. I recommend getting a few hijab caps regardless of they style you are looking at. They come in all sorts of materials but the stretchy cotton tube caps are the best in my opinion.

That is pretty much all I can think of... if you have any questions feel free to comment and ask.

If you are interested in covering, I say go for it. Don't let the opinions of others stop you from doing something that might be right for you.  If you don't try you will never know...
Also, mark your calenders for September 21st and join those of us who DO cover, regardless of faith/religion, for Covered In Light Day!

Lammas ~ Lughnasadh ~ Lùnastal

A dear friend of mine is a devotee of Lugh. When she smiles you can feel His sunshine pouring out of her. It's a wonderful thing to be around.

A few months ago she and I had an in depth conversation about Lugh, boobs and the many meanings of the word dude. I was born and raised on the West Coast and speak Dude fluently. Apparently, so does Lugh. I know, no one here is shocked. Not long after the Lugh-Dude-Boobs conversations I found this picture. 

Now, before anyone out there in Pagan Internetland gets their knickers in a twist, please note that I am NOT calling Lugh a slacker. I just find love this picture as I refer to myself and a Lazy/Slacker Pagan. I also like that I found this picture the same night that I found out that Lugh uses the word dude. My friend I mentioned at the start of this entry and I refer to Him as The Dude from time to time. 

So...basically... this entire post (though really its not that long) was just done in an effort to wish you all a Blessed Lughnasadh. May your lives overflow with joy and laughter this First Harvest and may The Dude shine his brilliant and loving light upon you today. 

Shabbat Shalom - I am a half ass JeWitch.

As I mentioned before, I am slow to do things religiously speaking. 

I have been meaning to work certain bits of Judaism into my personal practice for four years now. I started with covering my hair when I am outside my house (because I am married) and celebrating Chanukah...

Tonight I lit the Shabbat candles for the first time. I said the prayer and I lit a candle for Loki and Sigyn as well. 

It felt good. Doing that one thing. Lighting the candles. Running my hands over the flames three times, covering my eyes and mumbling the prayer to myself in slightly broken Hebrew felt good. It felt like home. 

I didn't do the ritual hand washing or say the motzi blessing, but I lit those candles. I lit them at the proper time and as I write this those candles are all still burning. They are low, but burning.

I know that there is a lot I still have to learn. I have a goal for myself for this year. I need to be more dedicated in regards to Loki and Brigid, but I also want to be more observant in regards to Judaism as well. 

I am drawn to the cultural aspects of the faith. Not Hashem, though I have no issues with Him at all. He is just not my G-d. My interest in Judaism is almost atheistic. I like the ritual of the practices not the faith.

I hope that I will be able to continue on this way, lighting the Shabbat candles at the end of the week and celebrating the High Holy Days and Chanukah. 

Shabbat Shalom!