Shabbat Shalom - I am a half ass JeWitch.

As I mentioned before, I am slow to do things religiously speaking. 

I have been meaning to work certain bits of Judaism into my personal practice for four years now. I started with covering my hair when I am outside my house (because I am married) and celebrating Chanukah...

Tonight I lit the Shabbat candles for the first time. I said the prayer and I lit a candle for Loki and Sigyn as well. 

It felt good. Doing that one thing. Lighting the candles. Running my hands over the flames three times, covering my eyes and mumbling the prayer to myself in slightly broken Hebrew felt good. It felt like home. 

I didn't do the ritual hand washing or say the motzi blessing, but I lit those candles. I lit them at the proper time and as I write this those candles are all still burning. They are low, but burning.

I know that there is a lot I still have to learn. I have a goal for myself for this year. I need to be more dedicated in regards to Loki and Brigid, but I also want to be more observant in regards to Judaism as well. 

I am drawn to the cultural aspects of the faith. Not Hashem, though I have no issues with Him at all. He is just not my G-d. My interest in Judaism is almost atheistic. I like the ritual of the practices not the faith.

I hope that I will be able to continue on this way, lighting the Shabbat candles at the end of the week and celebrating the High Holy Days and Chanukah. 

Shabbat Shalom! 

Month for Loki day 11 - It's been a while...

I feel bad for not updating for the past 9 days.
Things have been funky and strange around my house. Loki has fallen to the side as I have worked on a few things here...
I hope to finally get a few things done for Him and for Sigyn this weekend.

Anyway...
I struggle with the concept of prayer. I am not very good at off the cuff prayers so I tend to use things I find that others have written (chants, songs, poems and prayers).

I found these online and use them from time to time:

I like them enough that when I get off work in about an hour I will be lighting a candle and saying those prayers.

Hail Loki!

Month for Loki day 10 - Toys for Tots... or something like that.

A few days ago I was thinking of what I could get for Narvi and Vali to put on my altar. All I could think about was toy cars. Interestingly enough, when I thought about the toy cars for Them I didn't think about them being on my altar. I thought about the cars being in the dirt beneath Laufey's branches. A bit like children playing at their Grandmothers feet.

I decided to wait on getting Them something until I was 100% positive that what I was getting was right.

Yesterday I posted that I need to walk my talk. I need to be the devotee I keep promising Loki I will be. I need to be the person I keep promising to myself as well.

Well, today I was in the grocery store and as my husband and I were checking out I noticed two Hot Wheels cars on the end cap where the gum is displayed. When I say two cars, I mean just that. Two cars. No more, no less. One car was two different shades of blue with what are probably supposed to be flames but I think look like waves. The other was a green pickup truck with a bit of "woodland" camouflage on the sides. A bit fitting if you think about it...

I bought the trucks and brought them home. Right now they are sitting on my altar directly in front of Sigyn's ring, Loki's wood cutting and a small bit of brown pine needles that came off of the pine tree I refer to as Laufey.

Truth be told, I spent a bit of time this morning debating whether or not to hold the bowl for Sigyn today. I had a feeling that it should wait for another day.

I am glad I waited. I feel like the toys for Narvi and Vali are a wonderful thing. Not only are the cars for Them, the cars also show respect and honor to Sigyn and Loki as well.

This is a step in the right direction for me.

Here is a prayer for Narvi and Vali. I would just copy and paste it here, but it is not mine to repost.

Hail Loki.
Hail Sigyn.
Hail Laufey.
Hail Narvi.
Hail Vali.

Hail to the family of the Father of My Heart.

Month for Loki day 9 - Shit Or Get Off The Pot

I owe Loki a batch of scotch cupcakes. I have owed Him this batch of cupcakes for well over a year.
I also promise both Him and Sigyn that I would get toys for Narvi and Vali and that I would take up Her bowl and hold it so She could rest.

I am ashamed to admit that I haven't done any of the things I promised.

I have a tendency to put off today what could be done tomorrow. That tendency has cause me a lot of stagnation in my faith.

I read a few blog entries on well known Lokean blogs this morning that made it startlingly clear to me that in the past two years I have let my mouth write checks that my ass can't cash. I am not going to say that the blog entries I read were a direct message from Loki to me. I am not self absorbed enough to think that He would have His devotee's write blog entries with just me in mind. However, I do know that those blog entries were divinely inspired for people like me to see.

Sometime before the end of the month I need to make those cupcakes. Sometimes this week I need to make a cup of tea for Sigyn and get a bowl so that I can take Her place for ten minutes so that She can rest.
Putting these things off again is not an option. If this blog is about anything it is about my absolute need to make a place for Him in my life. In order to do that I need to stop making empty promises and fulfill the empty lingering promises I made over a year ago.

It has become clear to me that in order to move forward I need to remove my self inflicted road blocks.

Hail Teller of Harsh Realities.
Hail Forcer of Truths.
Hail Bringer of New Ways.
Hail Loki.

Month for Loki day 8 - Touching Fire.

The image above is actually a remake of a "Lokean Problems" meme I saw on Tumblr about a year and a half ago. Sadly, the blog that updated the meme is gone. The picture really does explain a lot in regards to my personal path. 

You seen, I am not only a Lokean, I am also a devotee of the Goddess Brigid. Between the two of them, my affinity with fire is fairly obvious...

I know that this month is really supposed to be dedicated to Loki and I love that this is a time set aside just for Him but I have two cill shifts for Brigid this month. There has to be a big of balance somewhere...

I have had to deal with the balance between the two of Them before. Not long ago I was contemplating moving Brigid off of my main altar to a smaller altar in my bedroom and giving the main altar to Loki. 

He never asked to have an altar of His own. He actually said a few different times that He was fine with His spot on the main altar. I ignored Him. I also ignored Brigid when She said that She was not willing to move off of the main altar and into my bedroom. 

I ignored Her to the point that She lit me on fire. 

Twice.

When I thought about why She lit me on fire I got a bit of a nudge from Loki and They both made it clear to me that while I kept saying that I wanted to do more for Them, I didn't listen to a damn thing that either of Them said to me. 

I have a feeling that between the two of Them I will be learning a lot this year. Specifically about when to listen and when to act. Something I am not ashamed to admit, that I really need to work on. 

So tonight, this entry is for Loki and Brigid. Just like my altar and my devotion.

Hail Brigid, Flaming Arrow.

Hail Loki, Fire Bearer.

I adore your Brigid, Quick of Mind.

I adore you Loki, Sliver Tongue.

Hail Brigid, Mother and Goddess my heart.

Hail Loki, Father and God my heart. 

Hail to the Mistress and Master of my hearts flame.

May your fires burn bright in me, that I might be a light for both of you in this world. 

Month for Loki day 7 (a day late) - Coffee and doughnuts.

I missed yesterdays post. To make up for it Loki gets two posts today...

I have been reading a few of the blog that are taking part in the Month for Loki and I notice that a lot of people give Him coffee in the morning. I rarely give Him food offerings but something about the idea of giving Him coffee struck a cord with me. I had intended to make Him coffee yesterday but got distracted and forgot.

I promised to make it up to him and made plans to get coffee with a friend coffee today. As I was texting my friend about getting coffee this morning this conversation happened:

Loki: I would like some coffee as well.
Me: I am going to Dunkin Donuts, do you want iced coffee?
Loki: I want a doughnut.
Me: I will get you a small coffee and a doughnut.

I ended up getting Him that small coffee (caramel iced coffee with whole milk and whipped cream) and not one but two apple cinnamon doughnuts. I set up a "quick and dirty" altar for Him at my friends place and lit a candle. The doughnuts attracted wild life (aka her cats) and one of them ended up on the floor...
I think He was pleased with the offering I made though.

It looks like I have a new morning ritual. Coffee, incense and a prayer for Him.  I think it will be a good way to start my days.

Month for Loki day 6 - Hail Laufey

I bought a tree at the Union Square Farmers Market here in NYC for Yule. I picked a small potted tree to keep on my altar and not long after I put Her there I started calling Her Laufey.

Not surprisingly the more I attempted to follow Loki's instructions and fix my familial relationships, the more His family started to make themselves known to me. 

I am not sure what it is that I need to do for Laufey besides tend the small pine tree that bears Her name. 

My husband and I just re-potted Her and She is now sitting in our living room window, which gets a great deal of morning sun each day. 

Here She is, in Her new pot: 

There is a lot of room in Her new pot, which is a good thing because now Her roots can spread and She can flourish. 

When I think of Laufey, Sigyn, Angrboda, or any of His children the expression "love me, love my family" comes to mind. 

I owe His children, Angrboda and Sigyn all a bit of attention but today/tonight was about showing Him my devotion by taking care of the physical representation of His mother that resides in my home. 

Hail Laufey, mother of Loki. 

May you always feel welcomed in my home.